When your life goes astray
It’s not a good idea, ashtrays
Not good to start your exit plan
Cirrus clouds call me home
To the great beyond
Scrub jays practice patience
Use my skills to numb the pain
Numb the radial artery away
Numb the neurons with beer
After months on the wagon
It’s good to roll in the mud
Whether pushed or self-inflicted
Test out your child’s anesthesia
But, it doesn’t numb the loss
It only pressures emptiness
I have my exit plan carved
Out of loss & endless waiting
Give me one more memorial day
Six hours of oasis among days
Twenty-four hours ago I had a role
In-between I dissolve into frustration
Dreaming of a crimson warm bath
Clothed and soaked in stain & sweat
Smelling of phenol and a blade
Dreams are all they are
But, they come to possess happiness
Others take for granted homes filled
But, I won’t take a bath, I will not?
But, arteries pulse for closure
Is it good to have an exit plan?
If you don’t care for loved ones
Build one anyways & tear it down
Joy is not loud compared to pain
Test out the latch, but don’t look back
You might see your child like a sun
Love anyways
Only assholes leave by the backdoor
Leaving a mess for the living to clean
Like a case of the runs expelled
Run on empty till God collects
Don’t rush Him nailing you
It’s not time to pull out
We’ll be free when the line ends
No need to dig new tunnels